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07 December 2007 @ 09:50 am
Illumination (1/1)  
Title: Illumination
Pairing: 10/Rose
Rating: PG
Spoilers: slight ones for S1 and S2
Beta: ganeris
Synopsis: The Doctor has some time to reflect on his feelings for Rose
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, If I did you'd be watching this story on TV
Status: Oneshot
A gift for earenwe, for the Secret Santa exchange at oh_she_knows.



Illumination


The Doctor braced his feet against the rough bark of the tree limb in order to scoot his body into a more comfortable position. Rose murmured something unintelligible against his chest in her sleep, burrowing closer to him as a chilly wind blew over them. Easing his back against the tree’s massive trunk, the Doctor cuddled her closer, making sure his long coat was securely wrapped around her shoulders, and gently resting his cheek against her hair, feeling its softness. She quieted then, easing into a deeper slumber, her trust in him as palpable as the tree supporting them both.

He’d wanted to take her someplace beautiful; somewhere guaranteed to bring out one of those glorious smiles he loved so much. They’d become an addiction of sorts, the determining factor in almost every decision. He couldn’t plot a course, choose a decade, or even enter a vortex, without first asking himself, “Will this bring me a smile? Will she think I’m brilliant? Is this good enough for her?”

Admittedly, he’d gotten it wrong a few times; coronations instead of concerts, Scotland instead of Sheffield, gone for months instead of hours. But this time; oh, this one glorious, spontaneous, impossibly perfect time, he’d gotten it so right.

It had been dark when they arrived at the research station, the observation window a massive black wall. He’d held her hand in his and pointed to the horizon, just as the second sun rose on the autumnal equinox. A massive forest of trees, reaching hundreds of feet high and stretching as far as they eye could see, had been suddenly illuminated. Rose had gasped as a firestorm of color swept over the landscape; painting a sea of crimson and gold, and tinting the world orange. Turning away from the splendor before them, she’d given him his reward for a job well done; flashing him a smile so beautiful it could rival anything this planet had to offer.

“Come on then,” she’d said, pulling on their still joined hands as she did so, “Let’s go play in your ginger world.”

The scientists, the only sentient life on Sankearn, had lowered them down into the canopy on hydraulic lifts, warning them to be back before nightfall. “You’ve got five hours before the second sun sets,” a bookish, overworked woman, had explained. “If you aren’t back by then, you’ll have to wait another five hours for the first one to rise again. We can’t risk lowering the lift in the dark.”

He hadn’t been concerned, and neither had she; their quest for adventure overshadowing any doubt that they’d make it back in time. But while they’d been skipping thorough tangled limbs hundreds of feet above the planet’s surface, swinging from vines of ivy, and hiding behind mattress-sized autumn leaves, the last Lord of Time had lost track of it.

He, who was supposed to be the Master of Minutes, hadn’t even noticed their passing, until the first pink rays of sunset finally filtered through the branches and into their wonderland. Even then they’d laughed, chalking it up to business as usual and challenging each other to a race back to the lift. They’d leapt from branch to branch; cheating death over and over again on their way, only to stop minutes later as night came crashing down in stark reality.

He’d suddenly remembered explaining Sankearn to Rose when they’d first arrived; how the duel suns alternately ruled the day, while leaving the moonless world in complete darkness during the exchange. “From brilliant light, to stark night,” he’d rhymed, charming another musical laugh from her.

It hadn’t been so funny later, as they’d sat, clinging to the branches lest they fall to their doom with one misstep. Guilt had ripped at the Doctor’s stomach as he listened to Rose’s teeth chattering, not two feet away from him.

“Rose,” he’d gently called her name, an apology for his carelessness just forming on his lips.

She’d cut him off; assuring him that all was fine, that she could hold out for as long as she had to, before asking him between clenched teeth, “Exactly how long was that again?”

Carefully shifting along the bark to get closer, the Doctor had wrapped an arm around her shoulders, at once alarmed by the fatigue he felt in her posture and the chill of her skin. “Lean on me,” he’d said, removing his trench coat to wrap around her shoulders, and pulling her into his chest. “I won’t let you fall.”

She’d snuggled into him, sighing in contentment as he wrapped his arms around her. “I know,” she’d told him, just as Morpheus caught her in his grasp. “Just didn’t want to leave you alone in the dark.”

The Doctor still held onto Rose, four hours and thirty minutes later; now acutely aware of every second that passed, every hour that ticked by. Her last words rang incessantly through his head like a mantra on steroids, bringing up new and old memories alike.

He’d been so alone before he met her; wrapped up in a darkness of his own making, hiding away in it lest any light be shed on the wounds he’d refused to let heal. She’d changed him, drilling holes into his dark world and forcing the light inside. He hadn’t felt alone since: not even when he’d sent her away, fully prepared to die on that game station; or in the bowels of an impossible planet, fighting impossible odds.

She was always right there with him; his conscience, his hearts, his very life. The Doctor’s whole universe was wrapped up in denim, coated in scented lotion, and dipped in peroxide. Rose made him feel like a person again, and not just a hero, or a villain. The whole of Gallifrey would roll over in their collective graves if they knew, but Rassilon help him, she made him feel so very human.

The absurd image made him laugh out loud, joy spilling out of his body as tears burned at his eyelids. It was the first time he’d been able to think about his people without the crushing weight of guilt paralyzing him, and it was all because of the girl in his arms; his Rose.

And in that moment, as the first golden rays of Sankearn’s first sun began to filter through the trees, and the outline of Rose’s lovely features finally came into focus, he finally admitted to himself just how much he loved her. And as the realization grew, so did his laughter; an irrational reaction to an irrational feeling that felt too right to be wrong.

Rose stirred, obviously awakened by his unexpected mirth. Her brown eyes sparkled with undiluted happiness as she gazed up at him, her lips stretching into another perfect smile.

Overwhelmed, the Doctor, finally, impossibly, lost control. In a heartbeat, his lips were on her smile, kissing her with all the passion he’d been storing up over the past two years, drinking her in. She stiffened at first, obviously a little surprised, but recovered quickly, cupping his face in her hot little hands and leaning into him. He ran his fingers through her hair and over her face, desperate to map every plane and curve of her features, to memorize this moment, to keep it forever.

Drawing back a moment later, the Doctor rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He needed to regain the unbending control that was usually such a part of him; lest he lay her down and make love to her right here in the trees. A gloriously romantic notion, he thought absently, but hardly safe.

Rose let out a slightly hysterical laugh, her joy unconfined. “What’s brought this on then?” she asked, her voice sounding as breathless as the Doctor felt. “Not that I’m complaining or anything.”

He opened his eyes to gaze back at her, his smile for once as bright as hers. “I was celebrating,” he told her, his hand coming up to once again caress her cheek. “The sun is finally up.”

_________________________________________________________________________________
Check out "Sun Up", the gorgeous drawing that aimeekitty made me for this story.
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Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
 
 
 
98.75% guaranteed: DW - Run Awayivydoor on December 7th, 2007 03:25 pm (UTC)
Rose made him feel like a person again, and not just a hero, or a villain. The whole of Gallifrey would roll over in their collective graves if they knew, but Rassilon help him, she made him feel so very human.

Oh, that's so sweet and gorgeous. I love all of it, but this bit was my favorite.

Very nice. :)
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 03:57 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much. I really appreciate it when someone tells me which parts they really enjoyed. :)
fid_gin: ponytailfid_gin on December 7th, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
I enjoyed this a lot - I love it when folks explore the Tenth Doctor's emotional-and-not-quite-so-goofy side, which we don't see nearly enough but which is so obviously present.

Thank you for sharing this!
svanderslice: DW - Rose Scarf Smilesvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 03:58 pm (UTC)
Thanks, that is exactly what I was going for. I tried to show his sillyness a little too, to keep him in character, but the underlying tone of everything was supposed to be a bit more intense than that. I'm so glad it worked for you.
was not born under a rhyming planet...roxyk630 on December 7th, 2007 04:33 pm (UTC)
This was simply lovely. Loving without being fluffy (though, I do love my fluff ;) ). It was...them. Thanks so much for sharing!
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Foreversvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 04:37 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! That is exactly what I was going for. I"m so glad you liked it. :)
me_eat_drums: togetherme_eat_drums on December 7th, 2007 06:02 pm (UTC)
Aww, that was lovely! It brought a smile to my face - thank you! :D

'And in that moment, as the first golden rays of Sankearn’s first sun began to filter through the trees, and the outline of Rose’s lovely features finally came into focus, he finally admitted to himself just how much he loved her. And as the realization grew, so did his laughter; an irrational reaction to an irrational feeling that felt too right to be wrong.'

That was my favourite part...beautiful and so wonderfully Ten!

Really enjoyed. Well done!
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:19 pm (UTC)
awww, thanks so much! I try really hard to get into the characters' heads when I write, so I'm really glad you appreciated the effort. :)
theyellow_daisy on December 7th, 2007 06:17 pm (UTC)
This was absolutely gorgeous! I'm smiling like crazy right now, because it was just so sweet. Thanks for sharing :)
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Hug (Satan's pit)svanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much commenting! I'm so glad you liked it.
(Deleted comment)
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:13 pm (UTC)
I'm so glad you enjoyed it! I'll be careful not to write too often though, it might not be too good for your heart, hee!
catsfiction: All is rightcatsfiction on December 7th, 2007 06:24 pm (UTC)
"The Doctor’s whole universe was wrapped up in denim, coated in scented lotion, and dipped in peroxide. Rose made him feel like a person again, and not just a hero, or a villain"

That's so original, and quite beautifully put. And I always love a good alien world (I'm not very good at writing them myself). They were having so much fun with those mattress-sized leaves.

Really poetic and lovely.
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Foreversvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:15 pm (UTC)
So glad you liked the mattress sized leaves. I've always found forrests to be a world of their own, so the idea of a HUGE one just seems like so much fun to me. I imagine you'd feel a bit like a sprite of a fairy.

As far as the line you quuoted, those feelings I actually took directly from the exact moment in your icon. He is so very pleased to have pleased her. It's written all over his face. :)

Thanks for the lovely review.
Harpinredharpinred on December 7th, 2007 07:56 pm (UTC)
This made me sigh in happiness the whole way through!

The Doctor’s whole universe was wrapped up in denim, coated in scented lotion, and dipped in peroxide.

This is my absolute favorite line. The whole fic was wonderful and is going into my memories.

Completely lovely!
svanderslice: DW - Rose Scarf Smilesvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:16 pm (UTC)
I'm so glad you liked that line, it was one of my favorites too. Thanks for the lovely review. And I'm really excited that you liked it enough to save it to your mem's. :)
rjrog77 on December 7th, 2007 08:00 pm (UTC)

I love how it's because he's utterly obsessed with Rose that he manages to lose track of time (how on earth does a Time Lord do that, anyway?) and condemns them to five hours out in the cold.

I'm also fond of this part: "It was the first time he’d been able to think about his people without the crushing weight of guilt paralyzing him, and it was all because of the girl in his arms; his Rose.

And in that moment, as the first golden rays of Sankearn’s first sun began to filter through the trees, and the outline of Rose’s lovely features finally came into focus, he finally admitted to himself just how much he loved her. And as the realization grew, so did his laughter; an irrational reaction to an irrational feeling that felt too right to be wrong."

svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Foreversvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 09:17 pm (UTC)
I'm so glad you liked that part. To be honest it was actually one of the hardest bits, and I rewrote it a few times. So glad it paid off though. Thanks for the lovely review.
lachrimtov on December 7th, 2007 08:18 pm (UTC)
Nice! It's a different direction than I expected after you told me about it on the phone, but I like it. You've got a very Donne-like gift of packing two distinct meanings into your final sentences, my dear.
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 7th, 2007 08:35 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much. Comming from you, that is high praise indeed!

What I told you over the phone was true, I had intended to go in that direction, but as I was writing it, the fic had plans of it's own. I followed the bunny, it led me somwhere pretty instead.

Thanks so much for your review. And maybe we'll chat later. Sorry about being so destracted last time. I think I was half asleep. lol.
starbuckhan: Goodbye hugstarbuckhan on December 7th, 2007 10:50 pm (UTC)
Lets see which parts were my favourite ... ummm.. *thinking about it long and hard* ... I'm gonna have to say all of it, loved every single bit! :0) xx
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Hug (Satan's pit)svanderslice on December 7th, 2007 10:55 pm (UTC)
awww, thanks! I really appreciate it. :)
in other words: dw ten&rose : meearenwe on December 7th, 2007 11:48 pm (UTC)
I LOVE it! Thank you so much for writing such a beautiful, beautiful piece. It is exactly what I had in mind. I really like how you took the theme of light and dark and weave it throughout the story - the last line had me in tears, it was my favorite bit that really just wrapped everything up so wonderfully. You really captured exactly how I believe the Doctor sees Rose and just how important she is to him, not just because she's a pretty female, but because she was the answer to the question he couldn't admit to having.

The descriptions of the forest were very vivid and I could acutely picture them as I read. I'm just so chuffed! Thank you! I know you had a harder time considering I didn't want any mention of Christmas, so I hope that aspect of it didn't ruin it for you. Happy Hanukkah to me! :o) You did a wonderful job.
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 8th, 2007 01:21 am (UTC)
I'm so glad you liked it! I was worried that it might be a bit too fluffy, but I guess I worried for nothing. Also, you managed to understand everything I was saying, and that's just wonderful.

And don't worry, leaving Christmas out of the story didn't bother me. I don't think I could have come up with anything original anyway. Happy Hanukkah. :)
Kalleahkalleah on December 8th, 2007 12:30 am (UTC)
That's just lovely - the arboreal setting, the sunset, the darkness. Beautiful.
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose Foreversvanderslice on December 8th, 2007 01:21 am (UTC)
Thank you, I'm so glad you liked it.
purplemonster77purplemonster77 on December 8th, 2007 04:18 am (UTC)
Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

He opened his eyes to gaze back at her, his smile for once as bright as hers. “I was celebrating,” he told her, his hand coming up to once again caress her cheek. “The sun is finally up.”

Oh, I see what you did there, you clever thing! :D

Perfectly written. I don't think there's much I can say that hasn't already been said. So, ditto on everything said in above comments, and I'm memming for later!
svanderslice: DW - Rose XDsvanderslice on December 8th, 2007 04:30 am (UTC)
I'm so glad you liked it! Double meanings are fun aren't they? Thank you for the lovely review. :)
Vincelia Valentinevinceliav on December 8th, 2007 04:49 am (UTC)
Awww very lovely. I love everything you write :)
svanderslice: DW - 10/Rose cuddlesvanderslice on December 8th, 2007 04:52 am (UTC)
Thanks. It means a lot, comming from you. :)